It’s All About Relationships
If we are to Lead Elegantly, then we must understand how to connect with others and ourselves. Earning the right to advance is one of the major tenets in Step 5 of the Elegant Leader with Voltage system. Your persona, your Golden Sentence, that transparent “what I whisper in the dark IS who I shout from the rooftops” character is where we must learn connection. In order for connection to “stick,” we must first begin with WHY it’s important to connect, HOW we connect and WHAT thoughts and process(es) are vital if we are to have lasting connections.
For many of us, when the topic of leadership is discussed, our initial thoughts immediately take us to significant people in our own lives – whether from real-life experiences, history of our forefathers to modern-day leaders in the US and abroad. Why do you think that is? For some, it’s the impact they made in the lives of others to shape an environment, situation or a country. For others, it’s the impact they made on individuals or organizations that desperately needed their help and influence – their voice.
Leadership is not about eloquent speeches, circling the wagons or grabbing a flag of righteousness and telling the minions to follow. Elegant Leadership inspires, it encourages, it mobilizes and leverages diverse populations to do more to accomplish more than can be accomplished singularly.
We’re not good by ourselves, but when we go out as a group we’re pretty damn amazing
A connection, in this context, is not a socially-inspired friend or some superficial relationship. It is a direct link from one person to another – that deep feeling or need where two people who believe what each other believes. We certainly know what a disconnect is. The “whoops” we see in today’s society driven by technology. We blame miscommunications on some form of perception, a lack of skill or willingness to hear and to listen to the individual communicating.
We aim our zeal with reverent fervor at another individual with reckless disdain without so much as a forethought or attempt at understanding…aww poor you, poor you, you’re left to wonder why your relationships don’t last, lack depth, meaning and purpose!
Successful leadership is the positive rhythm between your ego, the results and your relationships
A connection is that moment in time where a bond, a link with another person is formed – common ground is established, a shared purpose or value is met. Every step forward from this point is based upon that initial connection. Some call it chemistry, a spark, something they feel. Feelings are emotional, ever-changing, vacillating favorably and unfavorably continuously throughout the day’s life experience.
One reason external motivations do not lead to everlasting change is they are based on feelings as opposed to an internal belief system change that affects behaviors. They can stimulate change, but they are not the driver or the underpinning for foundational change. Connections are initially built on the perceived value of beliefs and actions. They are perpetuated on the repetitive positive or negative behaviors we exhibit.
In order to have deep, meaningful relationships that create a synergistic life experience at home or at work, we must connect with and to each other. Without this connection, the foundation of trust cannot be built, and the foundational existence of any relationship is not and will not be present. We weren’t created to be alone, and we all need each other…maybe not everyone for all of us, but relationships nonetheless. Have you met someone who you didn’t initially connect with, but as you grew to know them you really enjoyed being with them? Certainly, we all have and for some those relationships are highly valued because of the common ground that was forged. Common interests, beliefs, conference attendees, job functions, titles, schools and countries unite us to be connected.
“When you’re surrounded by people who believe what you believe amazing things can happen.” – Simon Sinek